Self-Care – The Most Important Thing You Can Do
Have you heard someone say, “Self-care is the most important thing you can do?”
Perhaps… You perceive that self-care seems impossible because you feel like you are constantly on the run. You simply don’t have time for self-care.
When we’re constantly on the run, we outrun the experience of Self as a loving, present being that is fully abundant and capable of success. What happens In the process of constantly running is, we miss our greatness. The part of us that is capable of manifesting what we seek.
Perhaps you desire for life to be different, yet believe you have to keep up the pace.
If the idea of self-love, of feeling love, or the ability to take time to care for yourself seems elusive in your life… There’s a reason and, as irrational as it may seem to your thinking mind, that reason is not simply because you are busy with your family, your job, your household chores, or your lengthy to-do list.
When we keep running, there are certain energies that feel unfamiliar to us. Energies such as being seated in a state of abundance, well-being, and okayness.
We equate those kinds of feelings—well-being, okayness, or loving presence—at the opposite end of a spectrum. A spectrum where on the other end we perceive “being successful is…” when we acquire things or accomplish our goals and desires.
Imagine how different your life would be as you consciously allow light to become love with every breath you take.
Self-care and self-love are byproducts that arise when you stop running
Self-love and its companion, self-care, occur when we drop inside ourself and feel these energies that we’re been running from, that we’ve been too afraid to feel.
I had an awakening experience over 20 years ago where each time I took a breath, this brilliant light from overhead would translate into a vibrational frequency we call love. It pour down through my system and into the earth and back up again.
I saw life from a new perspective and realized that every experience in my life when I—
- Felt intimidated or afraid
- Attempted to figure out who I was supposed to be so that I could fit in
- Abandoned myself in some way to belong
These actions were, instead, an effort that was compromising my whole, authentic Self.
Based in my desire to return to that state of wholeness, of love, I turned my life into a living laboratory. I discovered, and now teach, how to build the circuitry to sustain that feeling of love in the body. That sense of love became my reference point to be lovingly present in all kinds of life scenarios.
I started to infuse love into all kinds of “protective pattern” circuits (what we often refer to as ego). As I infused love into the desire to outrun the uncomfortable feelings, my life changed. I’ve worked with tens of thousands of people over the past 20+ years and know that you, too, are likely outrunning your feelings.
Your soul’s desire is to reveal the greatness that is You
The Self which resides right there underneath those feelings you are afraid to feel.
Those feelings we are afraid of are constantly being tapped. Perhaps you call it pushing your buttons or being triggered. We often say, “Somebody is triggering or agitating me.” What we want to remember is that at a big picture, soulful level, you and that somebody both agreed they would push those buttons. What you’re seeking, your greatness, is right underneath the agitation you’re trying to outrun.
This sense of Self is actually the thing you’re running towards. A part of you wants your conscious presence to land on You, because then you get to have the experience of love.
Unconditional, unedited, unaltered love. Completely available anytime, all the time, love. Self-care brings us to that.
Self care is comprehensive and so much more than we think. It’s more than a bubble bath, a massage, lunch with friends, a walk on the beach.
Self-care could be—
- A pause before you say yes to something you don’t really want to do.
- A moment you notice when you’re about to agree to something that doesn’t feel right.
- A recognition you’re in an arrangement you don’t want to be in.
- A time you allow and feel the glory of the circumstance you are in.
- A choice to acknowledge your worth instead of believing the mind’s story that says you’re unworthy.
- A time you stop the self-sabotage and allow, not deny, your greatness.
The idea that you don’t have time for self-care is an illusion the mind created
As we begin to understand that ignoring the True Self translates to no self-care, we can make different choices. We embrace self-care, rather than translate it through what is likely our current perception—the need to take time out for self-care or I’m too busy for self-care.
Self-care can happen while you’re doing your job, while you’re tending to the family, or delivering on that deadline that is breathing down your neck. The only thing you’ve been outrunning is your greatness and ability to manifest the life you desire.
Self-care is being in a loving space—being present with the Self. It’s allowing yourself to feel the delight that is inherent when you are showing up to your natural state of abundance.
Begin to practice self-care by feeling (what you are afraid to feel)
You start to practice self-care by dropping into your body. You can do this by breathing in your belly as you open your heart, and allow yourself to feel everything that you’re feeling. Don’t worry if you do not feel anything the first time, eventually, you will begin to feel….
When you drop inside and breathe, it may feel like nothing or it may feel completely overwhelming.
If it feels like nothing, that’s okay, keep breathing deep in your belly as you open your heart. As you build the circuits and start to perceive the sensory awareness at the core of your being, you begin to feel. You are in touch with your gut and the deep wisdom available there.
On the other hand, if you feel… “Oh my god, there’s so much to feel that I haven’t been feeling. I feel overwhelmed and afraid.” You take one feeling at a time.
Say to yourself, “Okay, I see there are 15 feelings here, but I’m simply going to connect with one of you in this moment.” Choose one. Maybe you start with this feeling of self-judgment. Maybe it’s a feeling of, “I hate myself” or “I hate my body.” Perhaps it’s, “I hate that I judge the fact that I judge myself or “I don’t know why I do these things?”
Bring that one feeling inside your belly and inside your heart, and start breathing in your core. Notice how it feels inside your body to come present to the idea, to one feeling—for example, “I judge myself regularly.”
Self-care is coming home to you as the Essential Self
Come home to yourself and be present with that feeling in your body. Not present with it in the room, present with it in your body, because there’s a place in your body that’s activated when you think about—
- Self-judgement
- There’s no time for self-care
- I have to manifest this and I don’t have time
- There’s so much pressure to fit in, to do this right, or…
There’s a place in your body that’s activated with those thoughts. The invitation is to find that activated place inside your body. Then be present with that place as you squeeze or “hug” it so that you keep your mind’s attention there, and keep breathing deep into your belly through the core of your being.
Breathe in the Central Channel and squeeze the four anchor points that I teach in The Energy Codes® book and in my courses. As you implement this simple and effective breathing practice, you begin to dissipate the idea that there’s this horrible thing inside that you have to outrun to avoid feeling it. As you stay lovingly present with that uncomfortable feeling, it dissolves.
Work with these feelings regularly, once a day, a week, or once a month. You get to choose how often because you’re in charge of you.
The mind and its story
What I’d like you to know is, this practice is one of the most loving acts of self-care you will ever do because you’re training the mind to unattach from its story. The story which says—things are hard, nobody cares, you have to go out and prove it, or you simply have to do it all yourself.
As the mind unattaches from its story, it starts to learn its rightful “job” which is to enhance the love that is always here. This kind of self-care can be done while you’re doing life, it doesn’t require an extra hour in your day.
This practice automatically connects you into the vibrational frequency of delight and love. That same feeling you seek underneath the idea that you need a massage, your perfect meal with a beloved, or your ideal walk in the woods.
It’s about these things which you likely perceive as self-care. It’s also about you building circuits at the same time because when you land in the core of your being, it all gets to be yours.
If you’d like to learn more about self-care and building circuits, I invite you to join me for my new Heal Yourself Now Course. Discover how to access greater self-love and self-care with ease and to consciously live in the vibration of love and delight. Join me to learn more and deepen your understanding of these simple, life-changing practices from the comfort of home.
Dear Dr Sue,
Dear brilliant Village People Team,
I love you so much for what you constantly writing and saying about the truth of us. I love it because you feel it and so I feel it too. It’s a great unexpected present for me to discover your work although I am on the other side in the world in the middle of Germany .
As I took part in the HYN workshop much pain evolves in my belly and I lay in bed for the last three days sleeping and breathing and reaching out for helping hands of friends that came to me. I normally try to do everything by my own. It’s a little step in a great transformation-so I feel it. To ask for help and share my feelings.
I don’t know when I deeply will recognize it in the body that I am the great soul that wants to reveal itself and shine.
So I embrace these doubts and yearnings inside my belly body and breathe with them. Meanwhile I do this during I am writing …there comes a thought that everything is in order as it is.
Maybe this fear to shine is in everyone of us and it’s our job to embrace it all.
Thanks for your kindness love and everlasting presence.
I wish that I find my place to contribute my love and my talents in the world or that I recognize I am already there
In true love
Much blessings and sparkling rainbows
Christiane
Thank you Dr. Sue…I have your book and 2 of your courses…however I appreciate your reminders through your newsletters and such. Your guidance is greatly appreciated and I do try to remember central channel breathing every day. Feeling fear is difficult to breathe through and totally feel….thanks for your help!
Thank you Dr Sue. I am a practicing clinician in the mental health field. Your wonderful practices including the book “The Energy Codes” has transformed my practice along with those I serve. During these difficult times, individuals routinely struggle with the day to day problems which we all know has been exacerbated by “Covid” and the resulting stressors that persist…Your helpful instruction and precise methods demystify learnings related to the psyche. In particular. “channel breathing’ is a tool that gives many immediate relief and helps shorten the painful areas of one’s woundedness. Thank you for all you contribute…Much joy and gratitude
Fondly,
Dr Renee Irene Ross Boca Raton Florida